Roots
written during “poetry saved our lives”
I am a dark flower,
Why did you pick me?
my petals are evening purple among
sky blue pansies and sun kissed daisies
Why did you pick me?
now my roots are naked, dangling,
shivering in this early winter
When we first met
my roots grew deep
under carpet twisting
like the knobby knees of oak trees
tight like lymph nodes in my throat
when you first sang to me softly
When I rested my petals against your palm
my ears began humming
like the pipes of the radiator where I
warmed my blood vessels
which spilled into every tear
of my personality
yet consistently
my roots threaded them back together
I wish we could be together forever
but you might pull my roots so far apart they would no longer reach other
(it’s not enough
we’re not in love)
I can’t stop thinking about how these hairy roots are anchored so deeply in our conversation
my heart beats
with every syllable of your words
marking the stress marks
on every syllable my throat hugs
following the flow
of every syllable as they tumble
from my lips
because my linguistics has me split into earth quakes
scattered across the crevices of my brain
and hidden in these caves
little drops of japanese
これを聞いてほしい
they graffiti a mix of hieroglyphics,
But like the Egyptians I plea
Iwyt nyty
Everything that is, and everything that isn’t is absolutely everything
Darling, I would give up absolutely everything
But when I peer into these phonetic pools I want them to drown me
Because my tagalog can only tag a long
when I’m chasing after you
I guess you were right
only English will do
after you plucked me out from the ground
I saw your face,
like a sunflower tilting its chin towards the summer sunshine
I gazed at your captivating rays,
and wondered why you chose me
when my petals are so dark
when you needed color in your life
when my roots were so tangled
when all you needed was someone
to straighten you out